Chart Throb

After starting and stopping a number of disappointing books, this witty satire by Ben Elton was a refreshing change. Although I will never be able to view Australian Idol the same way again!

Chart Throb is one of those reality TV shows where the search is on for a star – and talent is not on the menu. Calvin Simms, a parody of the mean Simon Cowell (or for Aussies, Kyle ore Dicko) collects characters who simply “make good telly”. These he calls “clingers, mingers and blingers”. Together with his fellow judges, chosen carefully for their formulaic and highly recognisable “mumsy” (although casting a transsexual reality TV star in this role is extra funny) and… well… “stupid” qualities, Calvin sets out to manipulate the contest at every turn. Except this year, he HAS to manipulate the contest. The honeymoon is over in his marriage and the master manipulator has found himself with a wife strategically positioned to take half his fortune.

So, Calvin, to reassure himself that he is master of the universe, makes the following bet – if he can get anyone Dakota chooses to win Chart Throb, she will walk away with nothing. So, Calvin finds himself in a position where he either gets the ridiculously dorky Prince of Wales to win, or he loses everything.

But the rules are changing for all of the judges this year. Calvin falls in love, and finds himself distracted from his work. Beryl is wrapped up in her desire for more plastic surgery, whilst fitting this around the demands of her stupid wife and her daughter’s own failing pop career. And poor Rodney is forced to judge a wily ex-lover he would rather avoid. And behind it all, is an enigmatic contestant who seems to be willing to die (or kill?) to win…

It’s an entertaining book, that beautifully sends up our reality TV culture, and ends by stating that by 2050 EVERYONE will be a reality TV star. Now there’s a scary thought.